Man Blames Divorce on Faulty Ear Plugs--Sues Manufacturer

Terrence Templeton was a happily married man for 53 years to his high school sweetheart, Gladys. The two were inseparable and couldn’t remember ever really having any major fights in all that time. But Templeton, now 76, is divorced and says it is all the fault of the Acme Ear Plug Company.

Terrence, or “Tip” says that he’s been buying the same ear plugs going on 40 years and never had a minute’s trouble with their effectiveness. “Gladys is a talker, plain and simple,” says Tip. “From the time she’d wake up in the morning, till she laid her pretty little head on the pillow and whispered ‘night Tip’ she talked. Never really said much, just talked. And she drove me up a friggin’ wall with all that talking,” he said.

The ear plugs made Tip’s flawed wife, flawless. Gladys doted on Tip and Tip on Gladys. Everyone said they were that one couple who would never, ever get divorced. Ever. But then something happened that would change all that. The Acme Ear Plug Company made a change in how they made their ear plugs. They discontinued the type that Tip had been buying for the past 40 years, which they called “The Silencer.” Ironically, not only did Acme change the shape of the plug, but they also re-named it “the Quietude.”  

“They are just not the same product,” Tip told a jury at the civil trial he brought for damages against the Acme Ear Plug Company. “The design change of the ear plugs I’d been buying for 40 years resulted in a faulty product, causing me to lose sleep, become nervous, and eventually lash out at my precious Gladys one night in a fit of rage. Although I didn’t hit her, we both knew that one more word out of that woman and she would have been talking out the next side of Tuesday. We agreed at that point, we were going to have to get a divorce,” testified Tip through quivering lips.

Acme’s attorney would not comment on the case other than to say that the design changes have been made and the old ear plugs are no longer being manufactured. Gladys, meanwhile, has moved on and found love with Harvey Weinstein, who just happened to know a good thing when he saw it and went out and bought a Miracle Ear with volume control.

Should Kate Gosselin be Required to Pay Alimony to Jon?

With Kate Gosselin now bringing in a paycheck from appearances on Dancing with the Stars (DWTS), and Jon Gosselin still kicking around with no job prospects, it only stands to reason that he should get some of her money. I mean, let’s face it, he has 8 children to support and he can’t do it alone.

So, should he go back to court and ask for alimony? More than likely if he did, it would be granted and for several legal reasons, the strongest of which is that as the father of Kate’s children, he is expected to provide a stable environment for the children during visits and without the money necessary to do so, it could impact their overall well-being, both physically and psychologically.

But beside the legal implications of who should support whom, it is imperative that the children see their mommy as generous and kind toward their father and what better way to show that than to share her earnings with him. He was just trying to do the right thing by keeping his children out of the TLC spotlight, and by doing so, he cut off his only supply of steady income. That selfless act in and of itself should garner him at least a third or more of what Kate makes on DWTS.

Some may say that Jon is well taken care of by his current sweetheart and doesn’t really need the money; however, the fact remains that he is spending quite a bit of his personal time taking care of the kids while Kate is busy making a name for herself, and it shouldn’t matter who is making the money as long as the kids are under the impression that both their parents are well to do.

If nothing else, Jon needs cigarette money. Do you know how much a pack of smokes costs these days? With all the added stress of caring for the kids himself while Kate is off dancing with the stars, it would be unfair to ask him to give up the habit at this critical juncture.

So, the question, should Jon ask the Courts to grant him alimony from his working wife? All signs point to sure, why not? If it were the other way around, the question wouldn’t even need to be asked. And we’re betting Jon would be liked much better on DWTS than Kate anyway leading to way more money in the long run.