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Kamis, 16 Juni 2011

Patio Pal Pot Plant Kit Receives Conditional US Patent

An enterprising inventor has just announced his success in obtaining a conditional patent for a garden container he calls the “Patio Pal Pot Plant Kit.”

Bartholomew “Bongo “ Jones, age 74, has been working on obtaining a patent for the Patio Pal for three years and was delighted when he finally received word that his invention has passed the second of three hurdles in becoming an item that can be sold in stores nationwide [legally].

“Unfortunately,” said Bongo, “the last hurdle is the killer”…getting the feds to allow him to sell drug paraphernalia across state lines. However, once that glitch is worked out, Bongo claims that it is only a matter of a few months before consumers will be able to purchase the Patio Pal Pot Plant Kits complete with several different varieties of seeds at their local medical marijuana dispensaries [in states with medical marijuana laws on the books].

“All you will need is your medical marijuana card, a patio, and a green thumb,” claims the gardening grandpa,“and you’ll be growing your own pot from a hanging pot on your porch just like the professionals.”

Fashioned after the highly popular ‘Topsy Turvy’ upside down tomato planter, Bongo claims you can grow your pot in either direction. “Grow them right side up,” says Bongo, “or upside down to goof on your friends. It’s your choice.”

Bongo guarantees the special hybrid cannabis seeds he sells with the pot (growing container) are designed to grow low to the soil, but at the same time retain all the medicinal properties of plants three or four times their height.

The kits should be in local dispensaries come late summer in time for the fall growing season.

Kamis, 22 April 2010

President Obama Celebrates Earth Day by Promising to Legalize Marijuana

“Today, as we celebrate Earth Day, we must keep in mind all the wonderful plants and weeds that Mother Nature has provided for us for medicinal purposes, some of which are perfectly legal to use at our disposal, while others may have to wait just a tad longer to become a part of our own personal medicine chests.”

“While I don’t wish to make light of the seriousness of whether or not marijuana should be legalized in this great country of ours, I will say that I am honestly just not sure what all the buzz is about. I mean, it is a natural organic substance and can be cultivated just like lettuce or tomatoes in so many of our good citizens’ gardens. It’s not like it is being concocted in some pharmaceutical lab. It is God’s gift to man and government should have no hand in denying American citizens their God-given rights. Just ask those gun rights people about God-given rights.”

“So let me make one thing perfectly clear. Marijuana is not a bad substance and the quicker we get legislation to make it legal to grow and possess it on a personal level, the quicker we’ll get the bad guys off the streets and Mexico can go back to being a sleepy third-world country instead of thinking of new ways to get their Mexican brand of weed across the border.”

At least that’s what a bunch of my friends thought he was saying when they were all chowing down on some munchies and watching CNN News with the volume turned way down.